Zentraveler zeros in on the Mystery Crystal Skull!

You were warned Zentraveler! Remember when you were poking around in the mountains of Honduras and visited the White Royal Monkey Empire. What did we tell you then and what message are we giving you now? “Don’t tell a living soul!”

Not only did you write about it on a blog and now every Tom, Dick, and Harry— plus the Indiana Jones types have been combing our mountains looking for the 13th Crystal Skull. I think I have had enough of you humans prying into our business. Don’t be surprised if you are going on a journey that no human has ever taken. Seat-belts ain’t going to help where you are headed!”

“I see by one of our crystal chips that you have been studying “The Mayan Factor.” How did you enjoy the rolling mathematics? You must have thought of yourself as rather clever. I see you have basically figured out some rather complex spacial travel logarithms. As Sherlock Holmes would say:”Elementary, my Dear Watson!”

Still rubbing my eyes and wondering where I am—- as if in dreamlike sequence I could see the vortex of the 12 crystal skulls and a direct red laser pointing to the 13th crystal skull. Just then a voiceover came out of nowhere. “Remember the time you were in Belize during a tropical storm and we decided to rescue you for whatever reason I can’t remember.” I shook my head as if in a daze.

Out of nowhere I could see the pulsating Crystal Skull buried 300 feet deep in a hidden cenote. A labyrinth of colors cascaded in 13 different directions. I am thinking Mexico. They have lots of cenotes and a lot of Mayan history. It’s probably located just west of Tulum, hidden in the jungle mangroves covered over with layers of past civilizations.

Then as if you were hit with a jolt of lightning, a neon map lit up showing the exact location of the 13th Crystal Skull. I quick grabbed a pencil and paper and jotted down the following location:”Dam pencil or pen won’t write. Why is it every time you have something important to jot down the writing instruments just decide to quit?

My god I thought to myself how close I was to solving the mystery of the Crystal Skull. “Remember that blustery Christmas day you decided to go up the Monkey River with the Belize army bloke, photographing mating red iguanas, hanging over the water. Is that all you earthlings have to do is travel around and photograph everything that moves? You are so shallow it amazes me.”

“Thinking by accident you might stumble onto our sacred grounds we drifted a heavy fog thicker than pea soup over your boat. Your army bloke wanted no parts of this and turned the boat around blabbing about sacred grounds and sped down river and out of sight.”

The 13th crystal skull pulsated and gave the exact location. “It is located at the headwaters of the Monkey River— which is also the cradle of civilization as we know it. We figured since you have already invaded the White Royal Monkey territory, the location of the 12th crystal skull— It’s just a matter of time before you crack the code. We knew you spotted the 12th crystal skull, it’s encoded right here on our master earth crystal. That’s why we have called you in. In our civilization we are looking for a few chosen earth humans as a sacrifice to the gods.”

“So as you played with The Mayan Factor math code your virtual interactive calculations have turned up in our crystals and now it’s your turn to learn about our evolved universe and more.” Being drawn like a magnet I proceeded from the village of Monkey River up stream, where I ran across water glyphs stepping stones showing me the way. They reflected a white electronic outline from the water. As if viewing a deck of cards, I could see a Jaguar with a right paw pointing west, a large Rabbit standing tall with it’s paw pointing the way. Sometimes there were several Mayan Warriors and you had to chose the one with the ax weapon to pick your next clue and head for your next coordinate.

Talk about jungle! I hired one of the natives in a motorized tuc-tuc to take me as far as the boat would go. From there we proceeded through the water, where we entered a maze of tributaries, which were encircled in a water maze. We then proceeded on a barely visible jungle trail with animals of all descriptions showing up like pop-up characters in a children’s book. There was an amazing display of flora and fauna along the way– with it intense jungle smells and noises.

As if in your own private zoo animals kept popping in and out. We saw manatees, dolphins, and even the occasional crocodile. You could see and hear howler monkeys, deer, ocelots, coatimundis, and a variety of colorful jungle birds. They appeared tame! All of the terrain was identical. When the clues seem to run out or I was stumped I could look in the sky and see the Crystal Skull sending off light beams into the heavens.

As the Crystal Skull magnet pulled, I was catapulted some 300 feet by centrifugal force down a crystal cylinder at high speed. I felt as if I was inside a dryer at warp speed. One of the Black and White Royal Monkeys, silhouetted in a rainbow neon halo, poured me a cup of tea and proceeded to show me the 13th crystal skull. Upon closer examination I could see several spaceships and a series of UFO holograms imbedded inside the skull— plus a series of aerial routes leading in 13 different directions.

With an elegant British voice the elaborately adorned Royal Monkey went on to lecture about knowledge was always passed down from the Chief Medicine Man to the next generation by simply rubbing the skull and using a very complicated ritual. I could see earth imbedded in a microchip about the size of a pea. He laughed: “you earthlings think your such hot stuff. Do you remember when we loaded over one hundred million Mayans on one virtual space ship for an exodus? That was very successful! They have been called into duty in another galaxy and they are performing quite magnificent —I might add.”

As he turned the crystal skull I could see The Garden of Eden in a hologram. One-more turn there was Atlantis with all of it’s modern technology. He pointed out we are still within the pea size of this crystal and the skull crystals are set up to radiate through unlimited number of galaxies. The first stepping stone takes us directly to thirteen planets which then multiply by rolling numbers taking us into new unlimited dimensions.

I was beginning to get woozy and I shook all over as the Black and White Royal Monkey instructed me to relax while they shrunk me to the size of a nano-atom. Talk about feeling small! “In your new nano-atom state you will have very little resistance as we catapult you into the next world.”

“But wait a minute” I clamored! “I have some emails to answer and I need to tell someone where I am going. He roared and spoke in tongues as he laughed about us and our real world. “To us since we are so far advanced we have always recognized earth as a mere virtual world. I can change the location of the skulls by pointing my mind and you and your brilliant explorers will be chasing crystal skulls that do not even exist in your world. You see this is one card game where we are holding the cards.”

He was holding a hologram which simply indicated 13 planets, 13 skulls and the Mayan doomsday of 20012. “Earth will be dust!” Wait I said: “Can’t we change the course of humanity?” “No! With your current world leadership their isn’t any hope even for the Pope. You were all pre-warned so we have no choice other than to fulfill your self-serving prophecy to eliminate earth and start fresh.”

“You are one of the lucky ones. We only have to choose 12 more earth human sacrifices and our mission will be complete. Bright red eyes flashed to a pale lavender and I could see thousands of angels dancing in the bright blue skies— all trailing a multi-colored laser beam heading into the unknown. As he was giving me my final instructions he reiterated how easy it would have been to align the 13 planets with earth and we could have survived. Another big belly laugh when he said: “earthlings don’t know what survival means anyway— so why bother.”

Then it flashed in Google colored neon across the sky: The Mayan Calendar will stop at the 21st of December 2012 and the earthy world as you know it will end. Good Riddins! Signed: The Mayan Factor!

Footnote: We don’t use fossil fuels so you better burn it all up by 2012. It might just save us a nasty clean-up phase—-if you know what I mean. Beam me up Scotty— I’m out of here!

QUOTE: “Flowery Mountain is a treasure trove of marvels and esoteric lore as none other. Here fresh flowers bloom and the trees are ever green. Rocks are of all colors and spring waters of various hues. The wine decoctions of its genii clear the mind and the herbs culled by sages procure longevity. At night in the Hall of Shining Stars come whispering sounds from where the wisterias quiver. Unable to sleep I burn incense and read Taoist books.”

– Hua-shan chih —–dailyzen.com

THINGS YOU MAY NOT KNOW: Your mathematical evolvement equation.

THINGS YOU MAY WANT TO SAVE: Your energy field! You may need it someday to escape this earth.

ZENTRAVELER SAYS: It’s all in zee travel! Be mindful of space junk as you fly around.

Follow the Zentraveler Blog often for Travel, Health and Zen-like stories and such. Where else can you get a three in one blog for the price of free.


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Filed under Blogging, humor, Uncategorized, Zen fables

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